Obligatory DC snowgasm post, live from Park View!

Yesterday I went out and did some shoveling/took some pictures of the end of the world, live and already in progress! It very much felt like digging trenches. Here are a few select shots.

That's knee deep, friends.

Park Place.

Out of boredom, I dug a trench from yonder bush to the corner.

And finally, the snow bunny Elijah made out front.

Finally, for some perspective on the snow, Kent at the Park View blog has some footage of the Knickerbocker Storm of 1922, which of course destroyed the Knickerbocker Theater in my old neighborhood.

Open letter to Prince Gomolvilas: You corrupted me

(As emailed to the above named recipient.)

Dear Mr. Gomolvilas (if that's your real name):

This evening, I found myself glued to my computer for approximately 96 minutes while watching the entirety of one High School Musical. This is your fault, and I blame you totally. Your little teenage obsession finally wiggled its way into my otherwise respectable head.

This afternoon, I was sitting in the National Cathedral soaking in beautifully illuminated rose windows while listening to works commemorating the life of Abraham Lincoln composed by some of the greatest American music geniuses of the last century. Sam Waterston narrated one piece. Sam Fucking Waterston. These works were gorgeous. The culminating piece was Hindemith's setting of Walt Whitman's "When Lilacs Last in the Door-yard Bloom'd." A poem inspired by Lincoln's death set to music driven by the death of FDR and millions in the Holocaust. The baritone soloist was Asian, for God's sake, so you would be proud.

And where did I end up this evening? Watching High School Musical with Zac Fucking Efron. Zac Fucking Efron. I was casually searching for a movie to watch online, as this afternoon's entertainment had been a touch... heavy... and doing more reading on nonviolence theory just wasn't appealing to me, even though I need to get it done so that I can continue my God-given mission of changing this fucking shithole planet into something more bearable for us all. And what popped up under musicals, but High School Musical. High. School. Fucking. Musical.

And I watched it. And maybe I even liked it a little. And maybe I got a little bit misty at one part, and perhaps might have shed a single fucking tear. And maybe the gay one was a little endearing, with his cute shirts and all. All while my rabbit mocked me. See?!?! I was mocked by an animal whose brain is the size of a shelled pecan. And it's your fault. It's all your fault. And worse yet, there are still still two fucking more of these fucking endearing little fucking Disney gems left. And I'll probably watch them. And I blame you for corrupting me.

By now, you're probably sitting at your little desk laughing your ass off with your big beast of a cat. You're probably even wanting to repost this on your silly little blog. But I won't let you have the best of me, mon Prince. You may have corrupted me, but you shall not take my dignity.

Yours sincerely,

Jason A. Terry, M.A.

P.S. Watch this, you perv.

Tyrranical, monarchical rabbit announces presidential candidacy

Since I still can't decide who to vote for in the primaries, I've decided to just vote for my bunny, Buster. He immediately agreed to run, and his official campaign announcement is below.

O! Buster '08... The best there is!

You should vote for Buster. Why? Because Buster said to. Buster has a brilliant plan for Amerka. And what about experience? Buster already knows how to run a country, since he's currently the King of the Dutch Bunnies (conveniently/accidentally born in North Carolina for electoral purposes). That means Buster is a candidate you can trust.

So what does Buster stand for?

The EconomyBuster's economic stimulus package consists of having you ship him lots of cardboard to chew on. Think about all the cool stuff you can order online as a service to your country! And Buster "recycles" everything his little body consumes! Al Gore can't even claim that!

HealthcareWe've all had those embarrassing moments when our bodies do unbecoming things, sometimes disturbing those around us. Buster is here to help. According to a fortune cookie he ate tonight, a carrot a day will keep cancer away! By the end of his lifetime term of office, everyone in Amerka will have the healthcare they need.

National SecurityBuster's sheer intestinal fortitude will keep Amerka saferer. No terrorists. No extremists. No communists (are we even still afraid of them?). And no non-exploitable foreign immigrants.

Foreign PolicyBuster will travel the world to restore Amerka's once glowing international reputation. How else would he be able to satisfy his incredibly sophisticated pallet? And all you developing nations out there needn't worry. Buster eats a lot. A state visit will create jobs!

LeadershipUnlike some people who (have) occupy(ied) the White House, Buster knows what to do with a newspaper. That's the sign of a smart guy who's fit to run a country.

But after 8 years of government by idiots, can we really trust him?Of course. Buster's obligatory goofy campaign outfit is way more goofy than anything those other losers have tried on. And besides, you need to prove to your neighbors that you're not speciesist.

O! Buster '08. He'll make everything better!

(This message has been approved by HRH Buster Terry-Edelman, PhD^7, Esq.)

Conversations on weather

Me (waking up in the middle of the night): It's snowing out. Shit.

Later (like, 9:30)...

E: Come on, get up.
Me: No.
E: But it's snowing!
Me: I'm morally opposed to snow in April.
E: It's supposed to snow some more this afternoon.
Me: Then I guess I'll sleep all day.
E: Why don't you like the snow?
Me: It will keep the Easter Bunnies from doing their work.
E: So we'll send in snow bunnies.
Me: The snow bunnies are otherwise engaged in Alaska and Canada. You can't deprive the poor children of northern climates just because this town can't handle snow.
E: Then we'll have Buster do it.
Me: Buster hates snow.
E: No he doesn't. He eats it and plays in it.
Me: When we brought snow in for him, he just ignored it.
E: Buster loves snow!

Happy new year from Buster

Buster wants everyone to know that he's already drunk and being sexually inappropriate with other bunnies. He expects you to do the same with preferred members of your own species.

Buster opening a gift.

Buster in his party hat.

Buster on the dance floor.

Happy new year to all!

Holiday war on animals

Unbeknownst to me, the adorable PBS children's show Postcards from Buster (which is, of course, based upon my own pet bunny Buster's world travels and not some Arthur spin-off) was the victim of a malicious assault by none other than Secretary of Education Margaret "No poor, majority person of color public school left open" Spellings. The totally adorable show (did I say that already? It's really precious.) features the cute bunny Buster as he visits kids in various places and finds out about their lives. In so doing, PBS watching kids are exposed to different types of families, lifestyles, traditions, and thus have their points of view broadened. However, Buster had the audacity to visit a family in Vermont (figures) that had children collecting maple syrup. These horrible sinning children of course had two mommies. This led Spellings and various "family" organizations to protest Postcards from Buster, and it lost funding for its second season. Finally, after over a year of delay, the show is back into production, though for many fewer episodes than the first season.

Spellings, however, must have forgotten that animals secretly plot against people all the time. In this year's White House Barney Cam holiday extravaganza (a taxpayer funded glorified webcam that follows the First Dog), good ole Margaret failed to make Barney's cut. Honestly, if a dog decides that Karl Rove is a better dancer than you, there must be something up.

As a side note, Barney Cam is totally worth watching, as it's effing hilarious. Even more so than the spoof version. Also, what's with Laura Bush and her black cat?